Leaving Las Vegas
I found myself singing the words to that Sheryl Crow song in my head as we made our way to the Las Vegas airport to board our red-eye flight home.
I’m Leaving Las Vegas
Lights so bright
Palm sweat, blackjack
On a Saturday night
Leaving Las Vegas
Leaving for good, for good
I’m leaving for good
I’m leaving for good
I have now been to Sin City two times and I think that is my limit. I guess I’m just not a Vegas kind of girl.
1. I like to gamble (more specifically play Blackjack) but I don’t like to lose. Actually, losing makes me sick to my stomach and the more I lose the more I want to throw myself into the Lion pit at the MGM hotel. Sadly, Lady Luck was not on our side this trip. We were up and down the whole time but in the end, we came home losers.
2. I have no problem with the fact that there are strip clubs galore in Vegas (well, actually I do) but don’t throw the skanky girls in my face when I’m least expecting it. We came back to our hotel after a long night of walking (see #3) and what do I see as we come through the doors of our hotel casino? Oh, just a few pole dancers on top of the Blackjack tables. I had no time to prepare myself. There they were in all their skanky, STD-filled glory.
I actually think the idea is brilliant from a business perspective. How is a heterosexual male supposed to make good betting decisions with butt cheeks and boobs all up in their face? As for me, I think I’ll pass on losing my life savings while having the pleasure of getting sweat on by dirty whores. No thank you.
Oh, sorry let me guess. They are paying their way through med-school. Whatever.
3. I don’t know about you but when I’m on vacation I try to avoid exercise at all times. I like to sit, lounge, lay, ride, but walking is not a verb that I like to incorporate in my vacation vocabulary. I felt like all we did on this trip was walk and walk and walk. Everything looks so close (note: it isn’t), so we made the mistake of saying, “Oh we’ll just walk instead of getting a cab.” I thought my feet were going to fall off at one point. I attempted to wear heels one night but thankfully I listened to the little voice in my head that said, “ARE YOU CRAZY?? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING? TAKE THOSE DEATH SHOES OFF RIGHT NOW!!” and so I opted for a more comfortable option. Then of course the whole night I see all these girls wearing their gorgeous, sexy high heels and I’m feeling all sorts of shoe envy, while I’m schlepping around in my flip flops.
4. I could really do without the whole “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” mentality. Whoever came up with that slogan just needs to be taken out to the desert and shot. Ok, so maybe not shot, but at least permenantly take their pen, paper, computer, whatever away so they can’t invent anymore ridiculous slogans. I wish I could elaborate more, but let me just say that you really don’t know people until you go to Vegas with them.
5. Then there are the boobs. They are everywhere. And I’m not just talking about the slutty Blackjack pole dancers. I’m talking about the tourists. Or maybe they all live there. Maybe they put boob enhancing vitamins in the water or make breast implants mandatory. I have no idea, but everywhere you turn is a girl with a gigantic knockrs. Of course, most are fake, but does it really matter? When we first landed, I went off to find information about the shuttle to the hotel and the guy behind the counter kept looking past me while he was talking to me. I turn around to find out what he is staring at and right behind me is a pair of perky (fake) double Ds. No wonder he was so distracted. I would have been distracted too.
6. The guys in Vegas all think they are the guys from The Hangover. On our flight to Vegas, the guys behind me on the plane were all laughing and bragging about how they had lied to their wives and girlfriends about where they were going this weekend. Then they started singing T-Pain’s catchy little diddy, “I’m In Love with a Stripper”. I thought I was going to puke by the time I got off the plane. I had to physically restrain myself because my desire to turn around and smack the stupid, smug looks off their faces was so great I could hardly stand it. It wasn’t just on the plane. Noooo…these types of guys are everywhere.
So, you may be wondering if we had a good time at all. Yes, there were some highlights:
1. The U2 Concert–the reason we even went out there in the first place–was once again INCREDIBLE!! I loved every minute of it.
2. I loved the Bellagio fountains and of course I had to get this picture of my husband and his best friend doing the final scene from Ocean’s Eleven.
Move over Pitt and Clooney!!
3. The rides at the top of the Stratosphere. I’ve mentioned before that I’m a thrill-seeker so it won’t surprise you that this was my one “must-do” of the trip. Here’s a picture of Brad and me after the Big Shot.
4. And finally the absolute highlight of the trip—a surprise celebrity sighting!!!!
I’ll fill you in on the details about this encounter on the next post because this is already getting way too long and I need to go help my son with his book report.
Stay tuned….
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35 Things I Haven’t Learned In My 35 Years
Today, I’m turning 35.
I’ve often seen lists that people write on their birthdays and I thought it might be fun to make one. I started off attempting to write a “things I’ve learned” list but the more I thought I about it, the more I realized that I am still very much a work in progress.
I found it way easier to write this list instead.
The 35 Things I Haven’t Learned In My 35 Years on the Planet
1. How to whistle.
2. How to give up Coke Zero for good.
3. How to keep my house clean for longer than a day.
4. How to stop procrastinating and get stuff done.
5. How to talk my way out of getting a speeding ticket. (Once again, failed at this on Friday.)
6. How to not sweat the small stuff (This one mostly pertains to my poor husband. Otherwise I know that it is all small stuff).
7. How to make a ton of money doing what I love (and also figure out exactly what I love to do in the meantime).
8. How to surf. (Or better yet, how to get a really cute surfer boy to teach me how to surf.)
9. How to put eyeliner on my upper lid without looking like a goth freak.
10. How to fold a fitted sheet without it looking like it was folded by a gorilla.
11. How to roll my “R”s so I can sound sexy when I’m doing a Spanish accent. (Note: First I should probably learn to do a sexy Spanish accent)
12. How to get my husband to do his share of the housework without nagging. Or this one could also be how to perform hypnosis on people when they are not aware of it.
13. How to actually enjoy watching a football game so I could understand what everyone is screaming about on Sunday.
14. How to play chess.
15. How to correctly use a semi-colon; I must have been too busy staring at that cute boy in English class when the teacher did that lesson.
16. How to meditate without a. Falling asleep b. Getting distracted or c. Having strange out of body experiences and visions that freak me the heck out. (Yes, option c has happened to me a few times.)
17. How to create and stick to a budget that doesn’t feel like it is sucking the life out of me.
18. How to get my kids to stop whining and pick up their toys/clothes/underwear off the floor without being told.
19. How to get over a devastating break-up.
Note: It is scientifically possible to not be a part of the relationship and still be devastated by the break-up.
20. How to get cat pee smell out of carpet. (Or better yet, how to stop picking cats that have urinary tract issues. Sigh.)
21. How to be on time.
22. How to solve a Rubick’s Cube. (Grrr…did you know these wretched things are still around. My daughter got one for her 8th birthday. I thought I would never have to face that cube nightmare again and here it is taunting me to solve it.)
23. How to Carpe Diem more often.
24. How to taste the flavors in wine because seriously when I read the label and it says vanilla, blackberry, oak, etc…I can’t for the life of me pick out any of it. It all just tastes like wine to me, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing but it sure would be nice to have a more discerning palate.
25. How to tango, waltz, salsa or any other form of dance with a partner.
27. How to take control of my laundry pile so it isn’t always taking control over me.
28. How to walk in heels without looking like I’m about to tip over at any given moment.
29. How to play an instrument, carry a tune or do anything even remotely related to music.
30. How to keep a houseplant alive. (Seriously, I have no idea how my kids have lasted this long.)
31. How to sew, knit, sculpt, paint, draw or do anything remotely art-related.
32. How to stop spending so much money on travel.
33. How to learn to love to exercise instead of avoiding it like the plague.
34. How to get clear skin and keep it that way. (Seriously, pimples!! This is getting utterly ridiculous. How are you still here invading my chin when there is some teenager’s face that is much more deserving of an attack?)
35. How to drive a stick shift.
Well, clearly I still have a lot left to learn. It looks like I have my work cut out for me. My goal is to cut this list in half before I turn 40.
Or at the very least, learn to whistle.
Scorned: 10 Ways To Seek Revenge on Cheating Husband (or Wife)
Thanks to the internet, scorned women and men everywhere now have a plethora of ideas at their fingertips on ways to get back at a cheating spouse.
I’ve decided to compile them here for research/organizational purposes. I like to think of it as an arsenal. You hope to never have to use these weapons of revenge but you keep them at your fingertips in the event they may become necessary.
Top 10 Ways To Get Back at a Cheating Spouse:
1. Take it out on his car:
2. Take it out on his car some more:
3. Really take it out on his car:
4. Take it out on his boat (and other various belongings).
5. Plaster his lying, cheating face on signs all over town:
6. Get his attention with an effective, eye-catching billboard message.
7. Tell everyone you know (and don’t know) about his shortcomings.
8. Auction the cheating evidence off on Ebay.
9. If ebay isn’t your thing, you could always take out a Craigslist ad.
10. Dump his stuff at a public place (preferably his place of employment).
I’d like to think that I would never be the kind of person to do this sort of thing if my husband ever cheated on me. I could tell you that I’d take the high road and forgive him or just move on with my life. But who am I kidding? I’d probably do all of the above and then add a couple of new ones to the list just for fun. Revenge is sweet. Bittersweet, but still sweet.
What about you? Would you take the high or low road? If the low road, which is your favorite method of revenge on the list?
Thursday Thirteen: 13 Almost Posts
I’ve got all these little things rattling around in my brain right now. McMommy refers to it as Brain Potpourri and I think that describes it perfectly. Nothing earth shattering per se, just a few things I wanted to share with you. I thought I’d make a list. Hope you don’t mind.
1. Follow-up to the o.b. Vampire ad: I got a comment late yesterday afternoon from an o.b. rep that said that the ad had not been approved or endorsed by their company. I just thought since they took the time to leave the comment that I would pass this information along to my readers.
2. Twilight DVD- Thanks for all the feedback about the dvd. I finally made a decision and went ahead and preordered it from Target.
While I was shopping I happened across this board game that I had never seen before:
I had it in my cart. I took it out of my cart. Back in. Then finally, out. Although I was sooooo tempted, I decided to hold off on the purchase. For now.
3. The Hunger Games- I was starting to worry that Twilight had ruined all other books for me forever. Every book I have read since the saga has paled in comparison and been a struggle to get through. I am here to tell you that there is hope for reading life after Stephenie Meyers.
I wouldn’t say that I loved The Hunger Games, but it was most definitely a page turner. It is a young adult novel taking place in postapocalyptic America. The main character is faced with having to fight for her life in a Survivor-type reality show where the contestants kill one another until there is only one person left standing. There is so much more to it than that and it is really a very unique story. I have most certainly never read anything like it and I thought it had a great mix of adventure, drama, suspense and romance.
4 Stars
4. Flirting with Forty- I have two words for you as to why you should read this book: Kai Carson. I found myself totally hooked on this story and this character. The fact that he is described as being a sexy, young surfer with rock hard abs may have had something to with this, but I really couldn’t wait to find out how the island romance was going to unfold with the newly single mom who goes to Hawaii on her 40th birthday. This book was a great change of pace from the heavier stuff I’ve been reading and I think that if you are looking for a little escape reading this is just the book for you. I highly recommend it. 4.5 Stars
5. Wide Awake: After two great books, I was having a hard time figuring out what to read next. I started Second Glance by Jodi Piccoult but couldn’t seem to get into it. I was thinking maybe I needed a little break from reading. The break didn’t last very long because I have found something that has completely captured my attention. It isn’t exactly a book, but it may as well be. Happy Hour Sue turned me on to it and I have to say, it is FABULOUS!!
Don’t laugh. It is fan fiction (I know, geeky, right?) based around the characters in Twilight. The story is completely different, though. The biggest change is that there are no vampires in this story. It is definitely way more adult in nature with some strong language and I also hear there are sex scenes (still haven’t gotten that far) so be advised. The writing is surprisingly good and it is so fun to be back with Edward and Bella again. Read at least through chapter two before giving up on it. That is where I got hooked. It is really good! Here is the link:
http://angstgoddess003.livejournal.com/699.html
6. Hotness Alert!! Oh hello there, Rob. How did you get in this post?
This pic is new to me so I thought I’d share in case you hadn’t seen. There are more and they are HOT. Even if you have seen them, who really cares?! See the rest of them here.
7. GosWatch-New Photoshoot!!
Even this creepy doll can’t take away from Ryan’s appeal. He posed for a new photo shoot with this doll and his dog. I promise they are not all so odd. For whatever reason, this is my favorite. I like to imagine that instead of the Chucky look-alike, that this is a little McGosling on his shoulders. sniff sniff.
If you care to see any of the other shots, go here. They are actually quite good. The photographer’s name is Hama Sanders.
8. State of Play Ok, we’ve covered Rob Pattinson and Ryan Gosling. It seems almost cruel not to mention my boy McAvoy.
We have been watching the BBC miniseries State of Play on dvd. If you haven’t seen it, DEFINITELY CHECK IT OUT!!! I’m not just saying that it is great because James McAvoy is in it. Between the riveting storyline and the unbelievably talented cast, this mystery has held us on the edge of our seats for the past couple of nights. As an added bonus, Bill Nighy, the aging rocker from Love Actually, is also in it and he doesn’t disappoint. Seriously, this is good stuff.
9. Coming Soon I saw the trailer Ghosts of Girlfriends Past a few weeks ago and have decided that I’m definitely seeing this movie when it comes out:
It’s probably going to be a mindless, predictable romantic comedy and I just very well might overdose from the dimples on Matthew McConnaughey and Jennifer Garner by the end of the movie but I can’t help it. I still want to see it.
10. Idol -I haven’t discussed Idol too much on the blog since the first round of the top 36 contestants. My favorites right now are Matt Giraud, Anoop, Kris Allen and Danny Gokey. I’d like to see all of them in the final four. I’m not wild about any of the girls, but I do think the ones left all have talent. They just don’t do anything for me. I think Scott and Michael are holding on with a thread and need to step up their game if they want to stay. I don’t even know what to say about Adam Lambert and that horrific performance of Ring of Fire. I almost think I would have rather seen Joaquin reprise his Johnny Cash role before ever having to listen to that atrocity again. I’m talking drugged up, rapping, falling off the stage, lumberjack Joaquin, so that is saying something.
11. Amazing Race- Auditions for this show are coming to our town this Saturday. We were contemplating going down to try out. We thought, what the heck? If we don’t get picked, we don’t get picked but you never know. We were devising all kinds of plans on how to get on the show and then I saw this.
Oh. Hell. No. Running around Siberia on camera in my underwear is not worth a million dollars. Freezing cold plus being humiliated. No thank you.
Note to future Amazing Race contestants: Consider yourself on notice. Stick with the bikini briefs and skip the thong.
12. Don’t Forget to Vote- Last call! Polls close for Round Two of the March Madness tournament at 12pm EST today. Go here if you still haven’t voted.
13. Rats and Cheese-Totally and completely random, but I’m throwing it in here anyway. My daughter has made up her own little curse words and I’m all over it. When something goes wrong, she gets says in an exasperated voice, “Rats and Cheese!!” I have no idea where this came from or what it means, but I just couldn’t stop laughing the first time she said it. Now I’ve been saying it. It’s actually quite fun. Give it a try today.
Whew! So glad I got all that off my chest. If you are still reading at this point, you deserve a medal.
So tell me: Have you read any good books, seen any good shows or movies or made up any new curse words lately?
For more Thursday 13 lists go here.
13 Reasons To Cancel Fashion Week Forever
Reminder: If you have not made your March Madness (Hottest Man Alive) picks, go here to vote. The poll will close on Friday at 9pm.
ThreeBoys1Mommy is hosting a new carnival on her blog called What’s the deal with that? Wednesday.
The idea is to post about things that make you think WTF. You should definitely check it out. Here is her very funny WTF post about Windshield Tombstones. Tonight’s list is a combination of a WTF post, as well as a Thursday Thirteen. Why participate in just one carnival when you can kill a bird with a stone or something like that.
Tonight, I am coming down hard on the fashion industry because they are OUT OF THEIR MINDS!!!!!!! Let’s take a look at the most recent “unique” fashions to show up at the London, Paris and Milan shows over the past few months.
I believe that once you view these images you will 1. be scarred for life and 2. agree with me that they need to cancel all of these shows. Indefinitely. Call them off. Shut them down. Send the designers to jail.
Either that or just call them something else, because if this is what the experts call fashion then we are all in big trouble. Comedy, Horror or Freak Show would be a way better name.
Are your eyes ready? Let’s start with the guys:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Sadly, the women’s looks weren’t any better. I’d argue that they are actually worse. Prepare yourself for what you are about to see.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
Here’s one more Muppet Fashion Gone Horribly Wrong:
Finally we have what is probably my favorite reason to cancel fashion week forever:
13.
Yes, those are mice on her face. Can you even imagine the poor model that drew the short straw and got stuck wearing this mask?
So, yeah, that’s my WTF for the day. For more lists, check out Thursday-13.
If you would like to name any of the looks, go right ahead. Feel free to leave them in the comments.
13 Celebrities That I Would Send To Jail
One of the first things President Obama did when he got into office was to sign an order to close Guantanamo Bay within the next year. It was a bold move that was criticized by some and cheered by others.
It kind of seems like a waste of a good jail to me, but what do I know.
Of course, I’m kidding. I rarely never believe in torturing people and if there is evidence of that happening here then it sounds like the President made the right decision.
I was thinking of what could be done with the facility and I had the idea of turning it into a Rehabilitation Center for Celebrities Gone Wrong. There are plenty of them out there making the news and irritating me every day.
After careful consideration, I would like to arrest the following:
1. Lisa Rinna-For this Oscar atrocity, I’m putting you in my jail and throwing away the key. Life sentence.
(I am also very suspicious that you have weapons of mass destruction hiding in those lips so you will be watched closely by heavily armed guards at all times. Don’t even think of trying to plan your escape.)
2. Kellie Pickler-It seems as though you are going down the same slippery slope as Ms. Rinna. You are such a cute girl, but the madness has to stop. I’m arresting you so that you will stop it and stop it right now.
3. Chris Brown- You know why you need to be there, and I’m sorry but anger management classes just aren’t going to cut it.
4. Brangelina- You snubbed Ryan Seacrest on the Oscar Red Carpet because you think you are better than everyone else. Your sentence is 3 months but I may let Brad off for good behavior if he shaves that awful thing he has growing on his face.
5. Natalie Portman- First I hear a rumor that you are dating my Ryan Gosling. As you may recall, I was totally fine with that. Then I hear that you are canoodling with Robert Pattinson at the Oscars. Um, ok? What happened to Ryan? Was he not good enough for you? Now, only days later, I find out that you are being linked to yet another hottie (Rodrigo Santoro- Karl from Love Actually).
Look, I don’t blame you. I’d be doing the same thing if I looked like you. But you have to admit this is getting a bit out of hand. Six month sentence-trust me, it is for your own good.
6. Kristen Stewart and her dad- I just read that your dad said you refused to present at the Oscars because you will only present “when it’s a great movie, not just one that makes a lot of money.”
Who in the hell do you think you are? Look, I had my own problems with Twilight but you are the lead actress in the movie and you have three more movies to do. Don’t you think it might behoove you to just suck it up and be supportive. Either that or just shut your damn mouth.
I’m giving both of you a ten year sentence for that remark. If they can’t find anyone else to recast as Bella (yes, I’d be fine with that) then I’ll let you out on Twilight-arrest to make the movie. As soon as the cameras stop rolling you are back in the slammer so both you and your father won’t be allowed to do any more interviews.
7. Lindsay Lohan-Your crimes are really adding up- Another topless photo shoot, your scary skinny status, and that stupid “sshhh” tattoo. I’m getting ready to lock you up and throw away the key.
Actually, I may have to rethink my whole policy on torture if you keep it up. Consider yourself on notice, Lohan.
8. Pamela Anderson- You were already on my most wanted list after you forgot to wear pants to an art show.
I was willing to forgive that little faux pas. I mean who hasn’t forgotten their pants from time to time. It happens to the best of us.
Then there was the whole fashion week incident and I feel like enough is enough already. Your fate is now decided. It is the slammer for you and your glittery butt. Sentence-five years.
9. Val Kilmer-Honestly I was never really that big of a fan to begin with, but I know many of my readers thought you were hot. So, when you go from this
to this
to THIS
I think it is time for an intervention. This is a downward spiral that needs to be stopped and it needs to be stopped right now. I’m sorry Iceman, but this is for your own good. Sentence-two years.
10. People who are remaking the movie “Clue”. All of you deserve to rot. Why can’t Hollywood leave a good thing alone? Your sentence is indefinite.
11. Katie Holmes- I know a lot of you will blast me for this one, but it has to be done. Katie, I loved you on Dawson’s Creek. I genuinely want to love you now, but I just don’t understand why you insist on trying to make new fashion trends happen that are downright hideous.
Rolled jeans? Really?
Blue shoes with a red dress? Nice try, but I don’t think so.
And your most recent offense:
Your crimes of fashion can no long go unpunished. I think a few months in my jail will really do you some good.
12. Octomom (Along with her fertility doctor for knocking her up and Dr. Phil for putting her on his show)-I’m sending you all to jail until the babies are all over the age of eighteen.
You can share a cell with Brad and Angelina and work out all your issues.
13. Your choice. Who would you like to send to jail?
Do you agree or disagree with any of my choices? Feel free to leave me a comment and let me know.
For more Thursday Thirteen, click here.
Thursday Thirteen: 13 Answers
Yesterday, I invited you to my 300th Post Party and asked you to participate in a game of Loaded Questions. If you haven’t already, go over and leave me a question. I’m giving a $10 Panera gift card to one lucky commenter who plays along. It has been fun reading all your questions.
Today, on my actual 300th post, I’m here to give you some answers.
1. Carrie asked:
I’m new to your blog, so have lots of questions! First, what inspired you to start blogging? And how did you pick your blog name?
Well, I was inspired to start blogging for my travel business because I read that blogging is a great tool for getting the word out and attracting new clients. I started a blog about family travel and Disney, but I found myself not keeping up with it.
In the meantime I was constantly sending my friends pictures and news tidbits of Ryan Gosling. I started to get the idea (after several months of spamming them) that they weren’t as interested as I was in whether or not Ryan had shaved his beard or what color sweater he was wearing last Tuesday and how it really brought out his gorgeous eyes. Therefore, I decided I need a new outlet.
I toyed around with the idea of doing a full blog about Gosling but knew that my track record for blogging about one topic wasn’t very good. So, I decided I wanted a place to talk about whatever happened to catch my interest at the time.
I had lots of ideas for names but most were taken already. I really don’t know how I settled on Daily Mish Mash. I just liked the way it sounded, that it didn’t pigeon-hole me into one topic and it wasn’t taken.
2. Jen asked:
How has your “diet” been going since 2009? I’m assuming you are at least still thinking about it occasionally? Any progress?
Of course, I’m thinking about my diet. Sadly, I’m always thinking about my diet. I’m “blessed” with a family history of obesity so if I don’t watch what I eat I will easily put on weight.
I’m back to my heaviest weight again (according to the daily torture of the Wii Fit body test). I’m hoping that by working out and checking in every day (on the Wii), I will be motivated to start cutting back on the calories a bit more.
I’m going to try to cut out all diet sodas again. The more I read, the more I am convinced that it is the worst thing for your metabolism. The only problem is trying to figure out what to replace it with. I stink at drinking water (I’ve tried and tried but can’t seem to make it a habit) so if anyone has any suggestions on low-calorie, non-aspartame beverage options (please don’t say water, I beg of you), send them my way.
3. Jean (no blog) asked:
New to your blog… My question is how do you keep your blogging life separate from your real life, so that the two never meet? I have been thinking about starting a blog, but don’t know that I want everyone to know that it exists…
This is an interesting question. I have only told my husband, 3 friends, my parents and brother about this blog. I have fun writing it but I think it would put too much pressure on me to know that everyone I know was reading it.
Here are my suggestions for keeping your blog private:
-Tell no one about it! I mean NO ONE!!
-Get a new email address (gmail or yahoo) that you use for your blog.
-Don’t post your real name or pictures of yourself/ family.
I think that about covers it. It is very unlikely that someone will just stumble upon your blog if you don’t tell them about it.
4. Julie (no blog) asked:
What is one item in your kitchen you could NOT live without?
Aside from major appliances like the stove, dishwasher and microwave, I really can’t think of anything that I truly couldn’t live without. I guess I would have to say my 13×9 baking dish. I feel like I use that constantly.
5. Pamela (no blog) asked:
His blinds are open, would you watch your HOT neighbor?
I loved this question! And the answer is OF COURSE, but only if I knew I wouldn’t get caught.
6. Nina (no blog) asked:
Have you read Twilight??????? If not you should! It is such a good series that I recommend it to everyone.
Clearly, Nina is new to my blog. Of course, I’ve read Twilight. I loved it! I also recommend it to everyone I know. All my Twilight related posts can be found here.
7. Tiffany and Kristy (no blog) both asked:
Hi! I’m new here…so what’s with the countdown on your sidebar??
It is the countdown for the next movie in the Twilight saga–New Moon.
Obviously, I take for granted that not everyone is as Twi-obsessed as I am and I didn’t realize that the countdown might be a little confusing. I added a little note to the top. Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Tiffany and Kristy.
8. Sage asked:
I’ve got a pretty simple question – if you could be one fruit, what would you be and why?
I would be a pineapple. They are tough on the outside, but very sweet on the inside. Plus, I would get to live in Hawaii.
9. Heather (no blog) asked:
Do you have a scheduled “blog time” or do you fit it in your schedule whenever??
I don’t have any set schedule for blogging. I usually just blog when I see something or experience something that I just have to talk about. I do most of my posts at night because I am definitely more of a night person.
10. Angie asked:
My question is….Who would you rather have for a best friend, David Hasselhoff or Martha Stewart? And Why? heeheeeee!
Wow! That’s a tough one. Martha might be a good choice because then maybe she could come over and help me organize my house. Then again, I’m really not sure that we would get along very well because we are total opposites and come to think of it, she seems a bit mean. “The Hoff” seems like a fun guy but a little too full of himself. Plus, I’m not sure I’d be able to keep up with his drunk, burger eating exploits:
If I had to pick, I would probably say Martha.
11. Tara (no blog) asked:
What would your perfect date be…including the person!
That is an easy one. I already blogged it a few months back. The short answer is Ryan Gosling, dinner and dancing on a rooftop in NYC. Go here for the long answer.
12. Heather asked:
What is the best Disney-insider tip that you can share with me? Something that I’d never have known about but that is SO worth knowing.
I think my favorite tip is about the Fastpasses. Most people think that you have to come back to the ride at the time that is printed on the ticket, but it is a little known fact that most cast members will accept expired Fastpasses for later that day. Therefore, you can collect a few and use them later that day. They do have to be used on the same day though.
13. And finally, Natalie asked:
Hmm…how about something really random…if you were a song, what song would you be?
That is pretty random, Natalie. The first song that came to mind is that “I’m a Bitch” song by Meredith Brooks. I can totally relate to the lyrics, but I really don’t like that song. If I had to pick a song that I would want to be it would be this one because it is my all-time favorite and always cheers me up when I’m in a bad mood.
13 Gift Ideas For That Hard To Shop For Person In Your Life
I’m almost done my shopping. I just have a few odds and ends left to pick up and a couple of easy homemade gifts to make.
Inevitably, there is always one or two people on my list who I have absolutely no clue whatsoever what to get for them.
While online hunting down the perfect gift, I came across some real gems. I figured I’m not the only person who has this problem so I thought I’d share them with you.
Here’s the list:
For the special kids in your life…
1.
The Birds Barbie Doll Inspired by the 45th anniversary of the classic film, this Barbie® is like none we’ve ever seen before! Only $50
2.
Roadkill Toys Our Squash-plush range looks like roadkill. Feels like roadkill. And tastes like roadkill. But they’re not. They’re plush toys. Very macabre plush toys. It’s the way we make them that makes them seem so real….Only £25.00
3.
Giant Microbes–E. Coli Plush Toy Each of our GIANTmicrobes® comes with an image and information about the real microbe it represents. They make great learning tools, as well as amusing gifts for anyone with a sense of humor. Best sellers include: The Common Cold, The Flu, Sore Throat, Stomach Ache, Brain Cell, E. coli, Kissing Disease, Ulcer, Martian Life, Beer & Bread, Black Death, Ebola, Flesh Eating, Sleeping Sickness, Dust Mite, Bed Bug, Bookworm, and many more…Only $7.95
For the single women in your life:
4.
The Boyfriend Pillow Never curl up on the couch alone again, with this comforting arm that wraps around you as if to say, “I’m sorry work was rotten today,” or “No, you pick what we watch tonight,” all the stuff you’d never hear from a real…Only $19.95
5.
Vibrating Head Massager It massages your scalp, temples, and neck, which relaxes stressed muscles, increases blood circulation, and helps relieve aches and pains…Only $15
For the accident-prone or religious person in your life:
6.
Jesus Bandages Treat your minor cuts, scrapes and scratches with the incredible healing power of a designer bandage…Only $4.95
For the fashionista in your life:
7.
Chicken Handbag Here’s a whimsical purse that’s sure to get you lots of attention…Only $24.95
For the movie lover/ alcoholic in your life:
8.
Gin and Titonic Ice Cube Tray This ice cube tray creates little Titanic Cruise Ships and little deadly icebergs. That’s right…now your party guests can recreate the greatest naval disaster of all time in their drinking glasses…Only $8.99
(Special Note: The website plays “My Heart Will Go On”. Worth the click just for that. You gotta love a personal touch.)
For the cat lover / crazy person in your life:
9.
The Cat Cloning Fund Bank Stash your loose change in a bank that makes clear your savings goal! It may not collect interest like the First Savings & Loan, but at least you’ll have it readily on hand the next time you need some loose change for the vending machine…Only $9.99
Everyone needs a calendar. Here are two very unique ones:
10.
Animals That Will Kill Yo A$$ Calendar Beware! Animals that will kill you are everywhere! Nothing will make you more aware of these terrible beasties than this super awesome wall calendar…Only $12.88
11.
Bubble Wrap Calendar If you are one of those people who buys fragile items from the internet just to restock your own personal bubble wrap collection, then this calendar is for you!
This giant 48″ x 18″ wall calendar has a big, beautiful bubble covering each day of the year, just waiting for you to burst it! The hardest part of this thing is trying to resist popping all the bubbles for the entire year in one foul swoop…but you can do it! Only $29.99
For the hypochondriac in your life:
12.
The Complete Manual of Things That Might Kill You No matter what ails you, there’s a possibility that you have something really, really, REALLY serious. Well, it’s about time you take the guesswork out of the self-diagnosis. This manual helps you find the worst possible diagnosis for whatever is bothering you…Only $19.95
And finally, for the Twilight lover in your life:
13.
The Edward Cullen Doll Imagine all the fun you can have with this one….Only $152 and FREE SHIPPING!!
Update: This is an eBay auction that has ended. Darn! I was really thinking of trying to put a bid on this!
Will any of these gifts make it to your holiday gift list? What’s the worst gift you’ve ever received?
To see more Thursday Thirteen lists, click here.
Our Top 10 Toys List
Am I the only one who cringes the first time they hear a Christmas song?
I especially can’t stand “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” because whoever wrote that song is a big, fat liar. It is not the most wonderful time of the year. It is a cold, hectic, and stressful time of year.
I must sound like a total scrooge. Well, I’m not. There are some things about the holidays that I like. Here is my list:
1. Baking Christmas cookies
2. Eating Christmas cookies
3. Spending time with family while eating Christmas cookies
Here are the things I dislike about the holidays:
1. Pretty much everything else that doesn’t involve cookies.
That just about sums it up.
I hate shopping. I hate making decisions. I hate jolly music about shopping and making decisions. Thus, my general disdain for the holiday season.
One of the biggest headaches is deciding what to get the kids. Now my kids are old enough to write out their own gift lists, but there are a few problems with this.
Problem #1: My son is obsessed with video games. So pretty much all I’ve heard about the past six months is the Wii. He’s all Wii this. Wii that. Wii, wii, wii…all the way home. But instead of home, it is to the poor house. Have you seen how much those damn things cost? This little piggy is not happy about having to shell out that much money for a stupid video game system. (But we still did just to see the look on his face on Christmas morning because we are suckers.)
Problem #2: They fill the rest of the list with whatever they see on the commercial breaks between Sponge Bob and iCarly episodes. And we all know how that nightmare ends. Do I even need to remind you of Moonsand:
I shudder just to look at that picture.
Problem #3: Finally, they start listing the really random things that they will never get like a tv in their room or a dog. We may be suckers but there is a line and I draw it with the thought of my kids watching unrestricted awfulness and having to take out a drooly, shedding, whiny beast at six in the morning. Um, sorry, but that is just not going to happen.
So, it is up to me to fill in the gaps with gifts that I think they will like that they really hadn’t even thought of yet. So I pour over the Toys R Us and Target toy book looking at the latest and greatest toys. I’ll read through review after review on Amazon trying to figure out the answer to the all important question:
Will my child actually play with this toy for more than 5 minutes?
Most of the time, the answer has been no. I can’t tell you how many toys just end up at the bottom of the toy box or stuffed deep in the closet, never to be played again.
Or worse yet, the ones that win all the toy awards but are actually a piece of crap and break a week later.
That would be these:
Whatever you do, do NOT purchase the Bump n Chuck Radio Control Bumper Cars. They are the worst. They seem like a great idea in theory. The idea is to drive your car around and try to hit the other car head on or side swipe the vehicle to try to push the button on the side of the car and eject your opponent’s driver, but when the little plastic piece that holds the guy in stops holding the guy in, there really is no point to them anymore. Trust me when I say that you want to avoid Bump n Chuck.
There have been a few exceptions. And it is these toys that I’d like to give some special recognition.
Here is a list of the Top Ten Toys in Our House:
1. Webkinz: You can never have too many. Well actually you can because we do. I do have to say that my kids are constantly playing with them so I really don’t mind it that much. They play with them on the computer but more than that they are pretending with them. Just yesterday, they were playing “Animal School” and they also play “Animal Baseball” and “Animal Hospital”. You can’t go wrong with the Webkinz.
2. ChalkBoard / Easel: This is great for playing school, painting, etc…
3. Apples to Apples Kids: If your child is reading (even just a beginner) this is such a fun game for the whole family.
4. Silly Six Pins: My kids got this when they were toddlers and it is still a favorite. I love games that get kids moving.
5. Nintendo DS: This is a favorite of both my kids. The best part about this video game option is that you take it with you. I’m not a big fan of video games but if you allow your kids to play them, then I really recommend this one.
6. Magic Kingdom Game: This game is great for the Disney World fanatic. The idea is to tour the Magic Kingdom and see all the attractions on your list. The first one to the park gates is the winner. This is a favorite for family game night.
7. Disney Bingo: This is a dvd game and another great way to get your Disney fix. All my kids’ friends ask for it when they come over for a playdate. This is one of those games that you can buy for a preschool age child and get many years of fun out of it.
8. Hyper Dash: We got this last year for Christmas and the kids have really enjoyed it. It is another game that gets them moving and is a lot of fun.
9. Bratz Microphone: I’m not a big fan of the Bratz merchandise but this microphone has provided hours of entertainment for my daughter and her girlfriends. They love to put on shows with it. All you need is a radio that can be tuned to FM.
10. Hot Wheels Rollup Raceway Track: I’ve bought lots of racetrack type sets for my son and I have to say this is my favorite so far. It is really simple. You unroll the track, put two cars into the slots, eject them and see who gets to the finish line first (a little flag pops up to tell you the winner). It doesn’t do anything special (no dinosaurs that shoot cars out of the mouth) but it has been a really fun toy for both kids.
Here are all the toys in this handy dandy Amazon carousel:
Now, it’s your turn. I am asking for your help because there are only like 28 more shopping days before Christmas. Please tell me:
What are your kids’ favorite toys?
Leave me a comment and let me know or make up your own list. If you do, please leave the link in the comments section so I can come see it. Have I mentioned that there are only 28 shopping days left? YIKES!!!
13 Really Strange Halloween Costumes For Babies
A few weeks ago, I was singing the praises of Halloween. Now I’m cursing its very existence.
Where did it all go wrong you may be wondering?
Well, I blame my kids. They are ruining Halloween for me. Ruining it, I tell you!
It seems the difficulty with decision-making gene got passed down to them. They can’t seem to make up their minds on what costumes they would like to wear.
First, my daughter thought she wanted to be a panda. She’s been obsessed with pandas ever since she was a baby. We already had the mask and even though I can’t sew, I thought I could figure something out with black sweats and some white felt for the body. Maybe stuff some fabric filler to make her look chubby. I’m not very crafty, but I was excited about the prospect of turning her into a cute panda. Seems easy enough, right?
Wrong.
Out of nowhere, she has changed her mind about the panda costume. For whatever reason, she now wants to be a witch. What?!! Where did that even come from?
If my flip-flopping daughter wasn’t enough to drive me insane, then you have my completely clueless son. The boy seriously has no idea what he wants to be. He never does. Every year, we go through the same routine:
Me: What do you think you might want to be for Halloween?
Him: I don’t know.
Me: How about Mario from Super Mario Brothers? You love that game. That would be a fun costume.
Him: I don’t know, maybe.
Me: Since your sister wants to be a witch, what about a wizard? Like Harry Potter.
Him: I don’t know, maybe.
Me: What about a mummy. That seems like a fun costume.
Him: I don’t know, maybe.
Him: I don’t know.
Me: Grrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!! Well, if you don’t decide soon, I’m going to decide for you and you know what?! If you don’t like it, then that is TOO BAD! Because I’m about to cancel Halloween. Yes, you heard me.
(I have about two minutes of patience in me before reaching my breaking point and busting out the ridiculous talk.)
This is totally stressing me out. They have off of school today and come Hell or high water, we will figure out this costume dilemma!!
I miss the baby/toddler days where I could choose a cute costume, stick it on them and call it a night. It was so easy.
Speaking of baby costumes, I stumbled across some really ”unique” costumes ideas. Take a look and feel free to add you own captions for your faves in the comments.
13 Really Strange Halloween Costumes For Babies
1. This is supposed to be a peanut, but I can see how it might be confused with something else starting with the letter “P”.
2. This baby’s face says it all. Gross!
3. What scares me most is the fact that there are actual parents who will dress their kids in these hats:
4. I wonder how many people tried hanging their car-tree babies from the rear-view mirror to get the “money shot”.
5. This kid is going to need a lot of therapy:
6. I think this is actually a great idea. Who needs a Swifter when you’ve got a baby mop?
7. I can’t decide if these next ones are really cute or really disturbing. You decide.
8. I like burgers. I like babies. I’m just not sure I like baby burgers.
9. How about a loaf of baby?
10. Let’s just skip Halloween and get right to Thanksgiving.
11. Is this next one even a costume?
12. Here we have two costumes that are just gross and have no redeeming cuteness to them whatsoever:
13. I’m a huge Twilight fan, but I even have to draw the line at vampire babies.
Speaking of Twilight, supposedly they are releasing a new trailer today. I’ll post it when I find it.
What are your kids going to be for Halloween? Which strange baby costume is your favorite?
To see more Thursday Thirteen, go here.
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